TPN Novel 4 Short Story (3): Ray and Conny

 

[2050]

"Speaking of which, Ray...."

Gilda, who was looking at Emma with her brows curved, suddenly turned at Ray as if she just remembered something.

"How did you notice Emma there that time?"

Gilda asked the certain thing she had wondered for a long time. Being called, Ray looked up.

(.......)

They searched all over the world for Emma, wherever they could. Refusing to give up, they inspected areas that were erased from the map. Through small towns and unknown villages, one by one, they walked in pursuit of a familiar figure.

Even on that day, they combed through the entire area where humans lived. They walked all day but couldn't get any clues. 

That town was another failed mission. As the bus time was approaching, Ray and Gilda headed home.

Suddenly, Ray started running.

Gilda followed him, surprised. Even a bigger surprise: Emma was really there.

"Did you see something?"

Ray, sitting on the round chair, answered while holding own arm.

"It was Conny." 

An unexpected name was uttered, the children all widened their eyes.

"Huh?"

Ray ran through his memories and looked for words.

"I felt like I heard Conny's voice. 'Ray, over here' - Something like that."

Ray didn't believe in spirits. But at that time, he believed he had an illusion, heard a voice and felt a tug on his backpack. It was Conny for sure. Yugo and Isabella stood behind her. Rather, it felt more than an illusion.

Emma repeated the name that she heard from Ray.

"Conny?"

Norman tensed up a little and looked at her face.

"Do you...remember something?"

Emma looked down and repeated the name in her head. She felt something at the sound of the name, but nothing clear came to mind. Like her dreams, it felt like a fog that disappeared when she tried to reach out to it. Emma slowly shook her head. 

"I don't, but..."

Emma looked around the children and muttered sadly.

"Seems like she's a kid who couldn't make it here."

Emma guessed after hearing Ray's words. Norman kept silent and Ray kept his head down.

Maybe it was for the best, for her to forget Conny's final appearance.

"Conny was such a kind girl, you know."

Don broke the silence. Then he continued with a smile, perhaps in an attempt to shake off the heavy atmosphere. 

"She adored a stuffed toy called Little Bunny."

"She played a lot."

"Yeah!"

The children started talking about the little girl who couldn't come here with them.

"She was in my room."

Feeling nostalgic, Anna smiled. Emma raised her voice.

"Oh? Were the rooms separated?"

"Yep."

Emma pointed at herself and asked.

"Me? Was I with you, Anna?"

"Nope, you were in a separate room. You know what? When Conny was moved to the children's room from Mom's room, she was feeling down at the thought that it'd be better if she remained in her room."

"I see..."

Emma smiled. It must be fun to have a life where she would wake up with roommates. They'd be able to make a fuss in the morning and gossip with each other before going to bed.

"But when Conny was moved, she cried at night."

Anna smiled gently and recalled the past. 

Emma imagined a girl named Conny.

Even though it was supposed to be a child she didn't know, when Emma imagined a small girl holding her stuffed toy, she felt strangely warm.

[2042]

"Hey, Mom said that Conny will be sleeping upstairs with us from tonight!"

After dinner, Emma rushed into the dining with a broom in her hand. Norman and Gilda, who were also on the cleaning duty, turned at her voice.

"Wow! Really?"

Gilda's face beamed at the news. Norman raised his voice as well.

"Right...Conny is three years old now, isn't she?"

Usually, their new siblings were brought in when they are a year old. They spent their time in the cribs inside Mom's room until turning three. Then, they were moved to the children's room on the second floor where they woke up with their older siblings.

"It'll be nice if she's in our room!"

Gilda laughed and replied to Emma. "Yup, True!"

Though there were siblings older than them, Emma and Gilda were 8 and 7 years old. They often had to care of the younger siblings. The reliable Emma and the caring Gilda were loved by the children as much as the oldest brothers and sisters.

Hearing the exchange between the two,  Norman spoke up with a smile. 

"Unfortunately, I don't think she'll share the room with you two."

Emma and Gilda widened their eyes at Norman's affirmation.

"Eh? Why?"

"Ah! I see!" Emma added as soon as she remembered the room allocation.

"Ray's room?"

Norman took her to his trail. "That's how it should be, right?"

Gilda understood the two after hearing them.

"I see, there's a free bed in his room after Kate left the other day."

An older sister from Ray's room left the previous week for her new foster parents. To balance the number of people in each room, Ray's room would be the one to receive the next child. Emma shook the broom and retorted.

"Eh~that's a bummer."

It was always exciting to receive more people in the room.

Firstly, the liveliness of the room changed at the moment of waking up. Some children were wide awake and some had a slow start. Heading towards the dining was when the changes were felt the most. Even before going to sleep, the children read the picture books and talked about their daily activities with their roommates until the lights went out.

Seeing Emma frown, Gilda raised her shoulders.

"But we of have our hands full with Thoma and Lannion at the moment."

Emma and Norman laughed at her gesture. The two mischievous kids that came to Emma's room last year didn't know how to stay still. From the moment they woke up, they screamed and ran around in their pajamas.

Norman smiled and resumed cleaning.

"Same room or not, I'm looking forward to having Conny with us upstairs."

"Yeah!"

Emma and Gilda agreed in unison.

Thinking about being with her beloved little sister, Emma could hardly wait for bedtime.

After showering and brushing their teeth, it was time for the children to go to their beds.

"Conny, this will be your bedroom from today."

With Isabella pulling her hand, 3-year-old Conny came upstairs.

Ray, reading a book on his bed, glanced up and looked at Isabella and his little sister. The little girl soon disappeared from his sight as soon as the children from other rooms gathered inside. 

The room where Conny joined was Ray's.

"Conny! We share the same room from today!"

Don called out to her young sister when he arrived in the room.

"Nice to have ya!"

"Mm..."

Looking up at her friendly brother, Conny answered meekly. All the children that gathered started speaking one after another.

"Aw, wish it was our room!"

"Everyone wants to share the room with her."

"Let's play a lot before we sleep!"

Conny's nervous expression slowly softened at the warm words.

"Ehehe, I'm happy."

"I'm glad, Conny."

Isabella smiled. She put down some of her personal belongings, such as her stuffed toys, in the drawer of the side desk.

"Conny!"

Emma rushed in from the hallway. Norman was with her.

"Now you're on the second floor with everyone!"

"Yes!"

Conny responded to her sister. Isabella patted the little girl.

"Alright then...goodnight, Conny. Everyone's here, so it won't be scary."

As soon as Isabella attempted to leave, Conny's face tensed up. Emma noticed the change; and pulled out something she kept hidden behind herself.

"Tada~! I've brought a picture book to celebrate Conny's arrival today!"

"Yay~!"

A smile immediately returned on the youngest girl's face at the sight of her favorite book. Standing near the door, Norman chuckled.

"Let's read together."

"Yes!"

The children gathered on Conny's bed and listened to Emma's narration. After confirming that the girl was immersed in the story, Isabella smiled and quietly left the room.

"And then, everyone lived happily ever after. That's it!"

By the end of the story, Conny was almost asleep. The drowsy expression soon relaxed into a sleeping face. Seeing her fast asleep, Emma looked around.

"Great. She's asleep, right?"

"Yeah."

Norman confirmed while putting the beddings onto his shoulders. When they noticed, few other children fell asleep in the same way. After carrying them to their own rooms, the lights were turned off.

"Okay then. Goodnight!"

"Night, Emma."

Emma and everyone else quietly returned to their rooms.

"Uuuh~ uh...Mama~"

Ray was the first one to hear a small cry. He turned at Conny's bed, trying to look in the darkness. Subsequently, Anna's voice floated in.

'"Conny, you can't sleep?"

Anna, who woke up the same way, got up while rubbing her eyes. Stepping off her bed and putting on her slippers, Anna approached Conny's bed.

Conny sniffled and whined at the older girl.

"I wanna go to Mom!"

At the moment the words left her mouth, Conny started crying loudly. Everyone else woke up at the loud noise.

Anna patted Conny's back as she continued crying. Coming to check the rooms, Isabella noticed the girl and decided to bring her back to the room downstairs.

"Just for tonight."

Kneeling down and looking at the whimpering girl, Isabella gently stroked her hair.

"You have to sleep with everyone from the next day, okay?"

"Mhm...Got it."

Conny nodded and calmed down.

Everyone else looked at her worriedly. Only Ray was biting back his yawn in a sleepy face, with no change in expression.

The next morning, Emma came running inside the dining and greeted Conny.

"Conny, morning!"

"Morning, Emma!"

"How was the new room?"

Conny looked at her sister's cheerful face and clasped her hands tightly. Seeing Conny's face down. Emma tilted her head in confusion.

"Hm? You couldn't sleep?"

"Um, you see...I really had to go back to Mom."

"Ah, that's what happened."

When Emma left the room, Conny slept calmly. So, Emma assumed she was okay. Hearing the story in parts, apparently, the young girl became scared in the middle of the night.

"I'm so sorry."

Seeing her nervous, Emma quickly tried to cheer Conny up.

"Conny, it's okay! 

Emma patted her sister, assuring that she didn't have to worry or apologize.

"You'll be able to sleep with everyone soon."

Emma's words finally encouraged her as she regained her smile.  

"Yeah."

"Alright then! Let's help with the breakfast together!"

Emma pulled the other girl's arm and brought her towards the dining playfully.

After the test and lunch, it was the usual afternoon free time. 

"Here it goes~!"

Emma threw the ball back at other children. Then she turned at the hill that looked small from her location, and left the group.

She ran towards Ray, who sat in the tree shade with a book in his hands, and Norman, who sat beside the other boy and watched the children play.

On her way, Emma checked where Conny was.

The small girl played happily by herself near Isabella who was stitching a cloth. Seeing that the three-year-old was no more as anxious as she was in the morning, Emma was relieved.

Reaching under the tree, Emma spoke up to Ray.

"Conny couldn't sleep last night, huh?"

Ray looked at her for a moment and immediately returned his gaze to the book. He answered while turning a page.

"Yeah."

"Oh? Is that so?"

Norman widened his eyes, the news reaching him for the first time. He, too, assumed that there was nothing to worry about as the little girl slept soundly when he left the room.

"She said that she felt scared in the middle of the night."

Emma folded her arms and tilted her neck.

"Hmm.... was it scary when I was taken upstairs for the first time?"

"I wonder. I don't really remember."

Norman put his hand on his chin and tried to think back. Then he chuckled by himself.

"But I don't think you were scared."

Emma was the type who'd be excited instead of being scared in a new environment. That side of her personality never changed, as far as he could recall.

Norman himself had no memory of being scared to sleep away from his mom, so he didn't know how to comfort Conny.

"How was it for everyone else?"

When Emma mumbled, the little boy and girls were still running around the hill. She could hear their voice as they chased each other.

"Neither Thoma nor Lannion cried when they were moved upstairs."

The two heard her and took a break, and then proudly raised their chests.

"Nope! We were feeling great!"

"We weren't scared even a li'l bit!"

The two cheeky kids, a year older than Conny, looked at each other. Emma grinned back with a smug expression.

"Haha, but you both were scared to go to the bathroom at night."

"Oi! Emma!"

"Don't say that!"

They poked Emma in embarrassment. 

"Hey! Let's play tag next!"

A kid who played ball waved at the five of them and called out. Emma followed Thoma and Lannion, who ran down first.

"Got it!"

Emma turned her head.

"Norman, Ray, you two should come too!"

Norman smiled and accepted her call. Ray passed the offer without raising his face.

The clear sky began to dye at the dusk.

The bell for 5 o'clock rang and signaled the end of free time. Hearing the sound, Emma and her friends headed towards the House.

"Today was so much fun!"

"I'm hungry!"

The air inside filled with lively voices as everyone entered inside. Amidst that, as if he suddenly remembered something, Norman called Emma at the front door.

"Thinking about it, I wonder what it was like for Ray."

"Eh?"

Emma turned her face and followed Norman's line of sight. A little ahead of him was Ray, pressing a book under his arm.

"Was he scared when he first moved upstairs to sleep with others?"

Hearing him, Emma crossed her arms and tried to recall her memories of Ray. Thinking for about three seconds, she looked at Norman and asked back.

"Do you think Ray felt lonely?"

"Uh.....I can't imagine."

Norman smiled bitterly.

The memories of his young age were blurry. Still, as far as he could remember, Ray was the same. He was calm, mature, and didn't speak more than needed.

They entered through the door, crossed the corridor and found Isabella with Conny heading towards the dining.

"Mom, what's for dinner~?"

"I wonder what we have today. What do you think it is, Conny?"

"Umm..." Conny loosened her cheeks while walking to the dining. Looking at her, Norman spoke to Emma.

"Let's hope that Conny can sleep peacefully tonight."

"Yeah! Let's think of something!"

Emma enthusiastically suggested, all for their adorable sister.

Emma asked her siblings for ideas to help Conny sleep in her bed upstairs.

"Isn't lullaby the best?"

"How about counting sheep?"

"The sound of music box makes me sleepy."

Gilda, Anna and Nat listed their suggestions. 

"Yosh. Let's try a lullaby instead of picture books tonight."

Emma decided to put the suggestions into practice. 

"Conny, we'll sing a lullaby together today, so you'll surely fall asleep!"

The night came and the children were around Conny's bed, once again.

"Okay."

Conny answered Emma, who sat beside her on the bed.

"Hah? Wait...'Everyone?' "

Ray, who put his back on the pillow and held an opened book, raised his brows at the words he heard on the other side.

"...Two, one, go! Fall asleep~ fall asleep!"

The kids around Conny's bed began a big chorus of lullabies. Conny was surprised and widened her eyes. Then she laughed amusedly and started singing along. The kids from Ray's room also got up and joined them.

"Conny, do you feel sleepy?"

"As if she would!"

Ray threw a pillow at Emma's head. The pillow throwing added to the excitement, everyone started laughing together. It was no more an environment to fall asleep. 

"Oi, Norman! Do something!"

Ray asked out the only one around who could calmly decide something. As expected, Norman was busy smiling. He gently advised Emma.

"Emma, wouldn't the other song be better?"

"The choice of song isn't a problem here!!"

Conny sang for a while, and eventually fell asleep. But she woke up the same way at midnight and started crying loudly, wanting to sleep with Isabella.

In the following night, once again, Emma and everyone else came to the room before the lights went out so that they could get Conny to sleep. It had been three days since Conny's arrival to the room. 

"Yosh! Let's count the sheep today!"

Emma proposed the next method. Anna, who was in the same room, taught the way. 

"Conny, close your eyes and try to count the sheep. Then you'll feel sleepy."

"What is a sheep?"

"Eh? Umm..... It's those fluffy animals."

Emma tried to explain with gestures.

"This is a sheep."

Norman opened a book and showed a picture of the animal. A sheep was drawn in a realistic way. Conny stared at it for a while and then spoke up.

"Erm.... Bunnies would be nice."

"Conny, you like bunnies don't you? Then let's count the bunnies."

Emma piped in and began to pat the girl who just closed her eyes.

"One bunny, two bunny...."

"Emma, shouldn't it be 'bunnies?' "

"Eh? one bunnies, two bunnies...?"

"The rules are kind of falling apart.."

Don coughed a little. Norman closed the picture book and smiled dryly.

"Well, the problem isn't making her fall asleep, but keeping her asleep until morning."

"Oh, yeah. We can't stay near her bed the whole night."

Emma put her cheek on the bed's headboard.

"How about the music box? She can play it if she wakes up...."

As she turned the screw of the music box she brought, Emma heard a loud sigh from the side.

"Haah...even without that, she'll fall asleep soon enough."

Emma frowned at Ray's passive attitude the whole time.

"Instead of saying that, Ray, how about you think of something as well?"

Ray looked at her and then dropped his eyes on the pages again.

"Like I said, she'll sleep when she's sleepy."

Emma couldn't hold her anger anymore.

"Ugh, Ray, why are you so cold? She's your roommate!"

Ray remained indifferent at Emma's scolding. The kids on the side tensed up. Norman tried to calm her down.

"Emma, Ray doesn't mean it. Isn't it right, Ray?"

Ray ignored Norman and resumed reading.

"Emma."

Conny pulled the sleeve of Emma's shirt. When Emma looked at her, she smiled a little.

"All of you always come to me before going to sleep, so it's not scary anymore. I think I can sleep tonight."

"Conny..." Emma looked at her smiling face and hugged her tightly.

After Conny fell asleep and everyone left the room, Ray opened his eyes inside the dark room.

"Ah, man."

With a small sigh, Ray left his bed. 

He confirmed that no one was around, then headed to the dining room. He passed the tables and opened the door of the grocery room.

"I've brought what you've asked for."

Inside the seemingly empty room, Isabella stood alone. She passed the fabric that she held in her hand to Ray.

"Fufu, brings back memories."

"...."

Ray received it silently and turned his eyes, then returned to his room.

Though she said it was okay, Conny woke up in the middle of the night.

"I have to sleep...."

Conny took a deep breath and looked at the ceiling.

Until now, when she slept inside the crib, she never woke up in the middle of the night like this. Conny gripped the small stuffed toy that had her name embroidered in it.

Conny felt restless and kept trying to be relaxed. Every time she woke up alone at night, she felt more and more anxious.

"Uh~ uhh~"

Conny shut her eyelids tightly.

"Conny."

The girl opened her eyes. She got up and turned towards the voice.

"Who...?"

Ray stood near the bed.

He's the brother with long bangs who always had a serious face. Conny didn't have many memories of him playing with her.

".....?"

Conny looked at him in question. Ray offered what he had for her.

"Here."

At first, Conny was afraid to receive it. But soon she realized what it was.

"Ah...!"

A soft cloth that fit well in her palms. Conny was pulled in by the nostalgic touch.

"My blanket!"

It was a blanket that she used when she was in the crib. The pastel pink fabric lost some of its colors due to repeated washing, but using a lot softened its texture.

"Thanks!"

Conny hugged the blanket and smiled at Ray.

For the first time, Ray softened his eyes and smiled a little. The darkness couldn't let her see his face clearly, but Conny could catch the hint of a smile in the gentle voice.

"Night, Conny."

Ray's voice put her at ease.

"Goodnight!"

Conny squeezed the edges and hugged the blanket, then closed her eyes. She took a slow breath, a nostalgic scent surrounded her. The next time she exhaled, she was finally asleep.

When the lights were turned off, the children couldn't go back and forth between the rooms. Emma was worried about Conny in the next room and sneaked out of her bed. Emma wasn't the only one thinking the same thing.

"Emma."

Being called by a whisper in the hallway, Emma looked back in surprise.

"Norman!"

"Shh..." Norman quietly raised his finger near his mouth.

"I wonder if she's sleeping."

"Doesn't look like she's crying, at least."

Emma and Norman slowly approached Ray's room and twisted the doorknob. They opened it as not to make a noise and looked inside through the gap.

"What are you two doing?"

The door was suddenly opened from inside. Emma and Norman almost fell in front of it.

"Wah!"

Emma hurried to cover her mouth.

It was Ray who opened the door.

"Ray! You're up?"

Norman looked at Ray's eyes, he stood there as if he waited for them.

"Is Conny sleeping?"

Emma asked in a quiet voice. She stepped in quietly, making sure that there was no noise of footsteps. 

The moonlight shining through the window made the room vaguely visible. Emma could see her sister sleeping calmly and comfortably. From her side, Norman also saw the sleeping face and smiled warmly.

"She's sleeping, I'm glad."

"This is.... a blanket?"

Norman then noticed the cloth Conny had wrapped around herself and pointed at it.

"Ah!"

Emma squeaked a little when she noticed it.

"I've seen it before, it's from the baby's room, isn't it?

...Did Mom bring it?"

Emma's voice was buried as Norman continued.

"No. Ray...it was you, right?"

"Tch!"

Just as he was about to pass it on Isabella. Norman's words made Ray squint a little. Norman smiled calmly.

"It's not the time for Mom to check the second floor yet. Besides, if she gave it earlier, Conny should've had it before going to bed."

At first, Ray thought about saying that Mom gave it to him to deliver it, but the reason could be misunderstood. So he admitted with a sigh.

"...Yeah. that's right."

"Eh? Really?"

Emma widened her eyes and looked at Ray again.

"How did you know that she'll be able to sleep if she receives this blanket?"

Ray looked down at Norman's question. Then, as if it's nothing, he answered nonchalantly.

"It was written in a story that I read in a book before."

"I see!"

Emma and Norman giggled and looked at each other.

"Yeah, that's Ray alright."

"Yep! Doing all these after saying all that."

"What the heck? Sounds creepy."

The two laughed without holding back and Ray looked at them uncomfortably. Emma spoke up with a wide smile.

"Whatever you say, you really did think about Conny, didn't you? I'm sorry for being angry."

Emma honestly apologized. Norman continued.

"Ray, too, looks over everyone after all."

"Ugh...you two, just go back to your rooms!"

Ray snapped angrily and pointed at the door.

"Fufufu, okay then. Goodnight, Ray!"

"Conny, night to you too!"

Norman and Emma quietly opened and closed the door again, just the way they entered, and left the room. After seeing their leave, Ray let out a big yawn and returned to his bed. He laid down, rested his head over the pillow and closed his eyes.

"How did you know that she'll be able to sleep if she receives this blanket?"

Norman's question came to his mind.

(No matter how smart he is, Norman couldn't tell it after all.)

Ray rolled over.

Ray, with his condition of having no infantile amnesia, had some memories from his infant age. He could remember being moved from the crib to the second floor.

Emma fully embraced the new bed and the new roommates. Ray remembered the older sisters saying that Emma slept soundly from the first night and danced around in the morning. Norman, too, slept without any trouble and didn't bother anyone. But when he was three, his frequent sickness forced Isabella to take him back from the children's bedroom.

Thinking from the older children's perspective, Ray believed that he himself didn't bother anyone either. But the first night he was taken to bed, he couldn't sleep well.

That time, an older sister named Susan brought him the blanket that he used in the baby's bed. She softly handed over the blanket and said maybe he'd be able to sleep if he had it.

That's how Ray familiarized himself with his new bed. The older siblings who knew about it are no more around. Even Isabella had forgotten until Ray asked for Conny's blanket. It was such a small event.

Ray intently listened. There was no hint of the little girl being awake.

In truth, he didn't want to do something that indicated his condition. But watching Conny, he wondered if she was feeling how he felt back then.

(....)

Ray sighed and listened to the sound of the peaceful breaths of his sister.

At 6 am, the sound of the bell announced the wake-up time.

"Fwaah!"

Ray, having to stay awake late at night, felt drowsy in the bed.

"Ray."

Ray turned at the voice that called his name. Next to his bed was Conny, holding a faded pink blanket.

"Good morning! And, thank you!"

The girl laughed carefreely. Ray slightly opened the eyes hidden beneath his hair. Suddenly, the feelings that he hid in his heart started to overflow.

One day, he'd have to see this little sister off.

(That's why I don't want to do this...)

The more adored, the harder to abandon. Thinking about it, he tried to keep a distance, but the homely environment of the House wouldn't let him do that.

You really did think about Conny, didn't you?

He recalled the words Emma said. Then he murmured to himself.

"I'm not such a good person."

When the time would come, he'd surely betray all of them.

"Ray...?"

Conny was looking at him with her head slightly tilted. Rays smiled brightly.

Then, until that day, at least...

"Morning, Conny. Glad that you could sleep."

Sitting on his bed, Ray reached out to his sister. The small face felt warm under his palm.

[2050]

Ray looked at his arm and listened to the story of their little sister that the other kids shared.

"I see, she was scared to move at first."

Emma thought that it'd be fun to wake up with siblings, but maybe some would be anxious after moving away from 'Mom' after always sharing a room with her.

"But she could adjust herself, didn't she?"

"How did she do that, again?"

"It must be our lullabies!"

"Eh? Really?"

Norman was silently watching the children who were talking about that time. Then, he turned at Ray.

Back then, he didn't know that Ray was aware of the truth. Perhaps his lack of infantile amnesia, too, made Ray draw a line between himself and everyone else.

Noticing Norman's gaze at him, Ray inquired as a response.

"What?"

"Uh-uh, nothing."

Norman smiled and shook his head.

"So it was Conny, huh."

"Yeah."

Ray grabbed his right hand again and quietly lowered it.

He wouldn't think that he was forgiven.

But none of those that he had to send off from the family would have blamed or resented him for it. That's what Ray had come to believe for a long time now.

--

Source: The Promised Neverland Novel 4: Films of Memories 

TL Note: for better understanding, here's a map of the first and the second floors of GF House.